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5/20/07 03:12 am - Just take your fast car and keep on movin'

I dont know
I like my friends
then I dont
I feel like I'm being a bitch to everyone in the path of Jessi, Jess, and Jessica
I just  feel like I'm a different person when I get called different names
when people call me Jessi...I feel naive, and excited all the time
Jess...I'm just Jess...short and simple
Jessica...you're either a grown up or in trouble

I'm struggling lately with just like...EVERYTHING
I dont know what I want
who I want to hang out with
how everything is supposed to run
if I want to party
if I w ant to be a good person..

I'm just confused and for the time inbetween cloudiness and clear-ness...I'm just going to have FUN

hopefully there will be a trip up to the PITS tonight..I hope so..and I hope my mom goes out of town...I want a good night  a really really good night tonight. I can only hope.

5/11/07 12:20 pm - homeroommmmm...boring.

Somehow, I want more.Collapse )

5/10/07 02:07 pm - Go away,Come back,Go away,Why can't I just have it both ways

I had a very nice time on  Friday. I liked it alot..being with my old friends...it made me smile lots and lots. I just really liked it and I think that we should all do it again soon. :-)

Yep yep yep yep yep...Happy Jessica...except for the fact that I have to go shopping with my grandmother and then go meet the "giant" and his "giant daughter" at the Ross Park Zoo for a "family picnic".....oh please..



family family family my ass

2/19/07 06:23 am - What goes around comes back around.

Choose 10 people in your life (friend or enemy, dead or alive).
Write a short "letter" to each of them, without labeling them.
You may guess who each is for or leave them as they are.

1.Oh, Jeez, where to begin with you. You are by far one of my best friends.
I rant and rave to you all the time, and you let me, you dont make me feel guilty. You make me
feel like I have a really good friendship. I could listen to you talk for hours. I'm so amazingly glad
that we "reconnected" last year. I love you to death, and I'll always be here for you, always.

2. You changed my life, you really really did. You took me away from an unhealthy relationship
that I feared I'd never get away from. I dont hurt myself anymore because of you.
I love you with all my heart and I know that you love me. You always tell me I'll marry you someday,
 I hope to god that happens. We do have our moments were all we can do is fight but then we make up and
its wonderful. You are so sweet, but you know how to put me in my place. I love the way I feel when I wake up 
next to you in the morning, the way you hold me and pull me back down when I try to get up. I love the way you
work so hard at everything you do.I know you're insecure, but you have no reason whatsoever to be. I love you
forever and always. 

3. You are so good to me. You are a truely amazing friend. I love you. So Much. I hope you get over asshole and
move on and find your Prince. I really hope you do. You are so much better then him, so so so so much better
you dont need that shit and consant guilt he puts on you everyday. I love you.

4.You're a bitch. You're stupid. You're dumb. You did it and are doing it to yourself. Lieing and stealing 
isnt going to get you anywhere in life. I wish you would see that. 

5. I really wish you would never leave me side. You have been there alot in my life. I can tell you're getting old
and it hurts me. I love you.

6.I'm not sure how you feel about me. I mean we talk, but sometimes I feel like you dont want to talk to me. 
I hate how we arent friends anymore, its kind of depressing...but I dont know. I'm always here for you, even
though you tend to think I'm not. I love you.

7. I miss you so incredibly much. Why arent you ever on?! Why did you get that girl pregnant?! Why did you 
let her get an abortion?! WHY WHY WHY! And You wouldnt talk to me about it, you wouldnt, I want my friend
back, I want him back, so much.

8. You are such a good friend. You are like a protector, you are funny, you are just all around a great guy. You are a great friend
and I am so glad we met last year at the lunch table.

9. Sometimes I feel like we switch roles. I love you to death. But as soon I as I can, I am out.

10.I'm okay with our relationship now. I like where it is at. It isnt pressured. When I want to see you I do. And 
we both seem to be at ease with that. We kind of at least have a relationship. I'm glad. because I want you to
be there for my wedding, I want you to give me away, to walk me down the aisle, I want you to have a relationship
with my kids. I love you I really do, and I hope you understand somewhat why I do the things I do and why I feel the
way I feel.

2/5/07 12:18 pm - Someday my dear.

The Hurt Survey
Let's see if you can get through it.
If not, you're too scared about the truth.

1. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Of Course.

2. Are you crushin on someone?

3. Have you ever liked someone so much that it hurt?
4. Have you ever made a boyfriend or girlfriend cry?
A Couple times.
6.Have you ever cheated on someone?

7. Have you ever told someone you loved them and didn't mean it?
:-[ Guilty.

8. Have you ever had your heart broken?

9. Have you ever broken someone's heart?

10. Talk to any of your exes?
Every once in a while.

11. If you could go back in time and change things, would you?
Nope becasue changing those things would have never led me to Matt

12. Think any of your exes feel the same way?
13. do u think your a good bf/gf?
Yeah...I kind of get jealous easy but I respect who I'm with. 

14. Have you been in an abusive relationship?
Ehh, Not really.

15. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

16. Do you believe in love at first sight?

7. Do you want to get married?
Yes. Yes. Yes.

18. Has anyone ever told you they wanted to marry you?

19. Ever liked someone else's boyfriend or girlfriend?
Uhm, before they stared dating but as soon as I know they were dating no..

20. Does heartbreak really feel as bad as it sounds?
Maybe, I don't know.

Are you single, taken or crushing?
Taken Baby.

Are you happy with where you are?
Of Course I am. :-].

When you meet the right person, do you fall fast?

1/6/07 01:04 pm

Down Down Down Down.

Thanks for pulling me down with you two, I was not even in that, and I got pulled under, but thanks, now, my Mom knows everything about me, us, even, and that thanks was a real one, bet you didnt think anything would turn out right for me, huh? Ha! You were wrong, instead of getting pulled down with you two, I'm above you....because... I KNOW HOW TO TELL THE TRUTH!

11/21/06 08:16 pm - fuck 'em I dont care

So...I'm really excited about Winterball alot. muy muy alot. And today was a bad day. I fell in the hallway and it kind of really hurt...and yeah, woot for not having to ride the bus. score!! I really hate the bus.

11/15/06 09:58 pm

A- Answers
Have you ever slept in a bed with the same sex? yeah.
Would you kiss a member of the same sex? Probably not
What age was your first kiss at? 15.
--Where were you? My House.
--Who was it with? Jack..
How long would you be willing to spend away from your family? ew. not long.

B- Bolding
I like apples
I'm thirsty
I'm crying
I miss someone right now
I'm really confused about one person

I'm soooo happy right now
I'm laughing at someone
I'm glaring at the screen

C- Confusion
I'm currently confused about....


A situation
SO many things

An ex-friend
An ex-bf/gf

D- Depression
Have you ever been depressed? yeah.
Have you ever self-harmed? yes.
Do you know anyone who has? yes.
Have you ever been on anti depressants? nope
Do you worship Satan? no.
Have you been labelled Goth or Emo? Nope
E- Either Or
Dogs or Cats?
or camping?
Best friend or bf/gf?
Shower or bath?
Wedding or funeral?
Blood or death?
Horror or comedy?

F- Food
I like...
[x] Pizza
[x] Spaghetti
[x] Skittles
[x ] Strawberries
[ ] Cranberries

G- Guys/Girls names
Like it, bold it.
A- Aidan?
B- Bayle?

C- Cameron?
D- Devon?
E- Evan?
F- Farren?
G- Gael?
H- Halyn?
I- Isra?
J- Jackie?
K- Kaedyn?
L- Laken?
M- Morgan?
N- Nat? (as in Natalie or Nathan)
O- Oakley?
P- Pete? (as in Peter or Petra)
Q- Quinn?
R- Riley?
S- Sam? (as in Samuel or Samantha)
T- Taylor?
U- Ull (yes that's a real unisex name)
V- Vail
W- Wallace
X- Xandy (Nickname for Alexander/Alexandra. No joke!)
Y- Yardley
Z- Zephaniah

H- Honestly...
Have you ever cheated on a bf/gf? Nope
Have you ever broken someones heart? Ugh, yes. 
Dumped someone for their best friend? :-\ Wellll...they werent "best friends"

I- I've seen...
[ ] POTC2
[x] Shrek
[x] Titanic
[x] Thirteen
[ ] Seven
[ ] LOTR
[ x] Anchorman

What inside joke comes to mind when I say...
Nail - 

K- Klondike bar. What would you do?
Your mom
Your brother
A donkey
Your sister
Your dad
Your grandfather
A dead body

L- Love
Crushing/Taken(If no one skip to M): taken?
Name?:: Matt
Year you met them?:: 2006
Hair colour?:: Dirty Blonde
Eye colour?:: Blue
Screen name?:: Holcomb2004

M- Maybes aren't allowed
Would you die for your best friend? yeah.
Would you stab someone if they held a gun to your head? Yes
Would you jump off a cliff for a bf/gf? uhm.

N- NEVER would I...
Eat a rat
Cry in front of my friends
Make my bf/gf cry
Kill myself
Drink blood

O- Other stuff
Do you like cameras? Yep
--Taking the pictures or being in them? Both, Depends
Would you rather be eaten alive or have to eat someone alive? how about neither
Be stranded on a deserted island or thrown in a dungeon? deserted island.

P- People
I know a...

Q- Quirky
I'm impatient
I tap my fingers on anything and everything
I bite my nails
I talk too loud
I laugh too loud

Im too crabby

R- Right now I'm...
Fighting with someone
Wearing shorts
Wearing pyjamas
Writing/reading a blog
At a party

S- Siblings
How many?  3
You are the Youngest/Oldest/Middle/Only? Middle, out of all of us. Oldest out of 'real' siblings.
--Like it? No
Spoiled? no.
Get along with your siblings? usually.

T- True or false
(( T / F )) I can lick my elbow
(( T / F )) I failed a class in middle school
(( T / F )) I just fucked up BIG
(( T / F )) I love you

U- Under or over?
Toilet paper: under
Bridge: over
Tunnel: under
Ladder: over

V- Very random
Favourite colour? Green
Favourite food? Egg Rolls.
Like the colour red? No, not really.
Favourite letter? J
Last time you went shopping? like three nights ago?

W- Who was the last to...
IM you: Matt
Hug you: Lacey
Kiss you: Matt
Write you a poem: i dont know.
Tell you they love you: Matt
Tell you you're worthless: no one has.

X's and O's
X for love
O for like
Nothing for dislike
[ ] Orlando Bloom
[ X] Johnny Depp
[  ] Keira Knightley
[ ] Angelina Jolie
[ ] Draco Malfoy
[ ] Harry Potter
[ ] Kevin Spacey

Y- Your opinion
Which quote represents you best?
-x- What you feel is what you are And what you are is beautiful
-x- And in the dark of night, I cry to you as tears smear the ink hearts, So carefully drawn around your name
-x- Now I lie through my teeth and I do as I please Someone might get hurt But it won't be me
-x- If my life was cinematic with a soundtrack so dramatic You'd be the hero And you would save me

Z- Zee end?
I love you:: yeah.
I'll miss you:: k.
Skittles=love?:: Yep

10/27/06 08:26 pm - plain text mode.

I pretty much get called a whore or a slut, in some way shape or form by you everyday. I'm sick of it. Your mother fucking jokes arent funny. No one thinks so. I dont know why you're acting like such a bitch when I tell you something,I dont fucking ask for it either. Why should I stick up for you when you are the fucking one bashing me all the fucking time,huh? It isnt fucking right. You both know that "joke" wasnt meant to hurt, and how many fucking times have I said "I'm sorry, if I knew it was going to be thought of that way I wouldnt have said it?" Way to many fucking times, and you sit here and you mother fucking bash me because I have sex with my boyfriend. Yeah did you get that, my boyfriend. It isnt just some "fuck".  Okay? So you can stop calling me, and implying that I am a fucking whore. If you say you're sorry to me,dont blame it on that because that guilt trip for me, isnt working for you anymore. All you ever do is bash me, and make me feel (whore)rrible about myself, and you complain that we dont hang out, that I dont call you anymore, well what the fuck? A friendship has two people in it, therefore needs two people to make it work. I want to still be your friend, you dont understand how much you mean to me, but getting put down 24/7 isnt fun.

10/21/06 11:46 pm - A better love deserving of.

I love today. :-)
Pumpkin Farms, Hay Rides, and Corn Mazes. :-)
It was nice.

"I wish my lawn was emo so it would cut itself"
I fucking hate people. Fuckin' assholes. Why people always have to say something about cutting itself I dont understand? Oh well Asshole. My view on him totally did a 360.

Reason I cant find my dad = He moved somewheres else.

Fuck him. I'm trying of trying for him. He can just go get drink all he wants and be daughterless.

9/24/06 05:45 pm

Blah Blah I suck . Oh fucking well.

8/26/06 07:12 pm



8/21/06 03:04 pm - Ipod survey

My first iPod survey. :)Collapse )

8/17/06 10:03 pm - :)

I guess I'm okay with me likeing him THAT much now.


8/8/06 04:25 pm - oh la de da

 I've done this one before but not sure
. Sometimes when I laugh I slap my knee & say, "That's a knee slapper"
2. I still listen to Hanson
3. N'syncs "This I Promise You" is my favorite song
4. My room is always clean
5. Easter is my favorite holiday
6. I love country music
7. I was born on Friday the 13th
8. I am really good at crossword puzzles
9. I never curse
10. Stephen King is my favorite author
11. I go to church every Sunday
12. I'm a health freak
13. When driven over railroad tracks I pick up my feet and make a wish
14. I hate Christmas
15. I NEVER get the recommended 8 hours of sleep
16. I hate my job
17. I’m still in high school
18. I’m related to someone famous (kinda, meaning, kinda famous)
19. When I order a salad, I get my dressing on the side
20. I hate Britney Spears
21. I own a “Spear Britney” T-Shirt
22. Passions is my favorite show
23. I don’t brush my teeth everyday
24. I’m not creative at all
25. I am very gullible
26. I never went to my senior prom
27. I watch reruns of Full House
28. I don’t know who David Hasselhoff is
29. I hate coffee
30. I love raisins
31. I have 2 brothers and 1 sister
32. I always take pictures
33. I love my handwriting
34. My favorite color is black
35. I don’t have a favorite color
36. Most of my time is spent playing video games
37. I have the Backstreet Boy’s new cd “Never Gone”
38. If the computer breaks, I know how to fix it
39. My favorite actor is Mel Gibson
40. I’d pick Hillary Duff over Lindsay Lohan any day
41. I hate small dogs
42. Winter is my favorite season
43. I’ve never been drunk
44. I hate Punk music
45. “That’s so Raven” is one of my favorite shows
46. Blue is my favorite color
47. I don’t know what ROY G BIV stands for
48. I’ve had my heart broken
49. I have posters of the opposite sex all over my bedroom walls
50. I tell my parents “I love you” everyday

51. I love the smell of strawberry lip gloss
52. I don’t know how to swim
53. Smores Poptarts are my favorite
54. I have never seen the movie Troop Beverly Hills
55. I am very easily distracted
56. I love the smell of nail polish

57. I always get sunburn & I never tan
58. I have very strong self control
59. My family gets along very well
60. I’m colorblind
61. The Used is one of my favorite bands
62. I run everyday
63. Brown hair & brown eyes is my favorite combo on the opposite sex
64. I’ve never been to a concert
65. I prefer cats over dogs
66. 24 is my favorite number
67. I think Jessica Simpson is gorgeous
68. I love my body
69. I own a Mercedes Benz
70. I already know what my future job will be
71. I’ve failed a class in school
72. Math was my favorite subject in school
73. I’d rather use pens then pencils
74. I have tried pot
75. I can chew over 2 packs of gum in a day
76. I prefer Milk Chocolate to Dark Chocolate
77. I don’t believe in God
78. I’m a vegetarian
79. I don’t have any tattoos
80. I don’t have any piercings
81. Family Guy is one of my favorite shows
82. I’m finished with college
83. I have been or are married
84. I hate donuts
85. I’ve been hit on by someone older than 45
86. I always act my age
87. I haven’t been in love yet
88. I’m happy Bush is our president
89. I don’t believe gay marriage should be allowed
90. I have never dyed my hair
91. I have met someone famous
92. I can dance very well
93. If someone goes to hit me, I cower and try to protect my head with my hands
94. I think the O.C is the best show
95. I would get up at 7:00 every morning just to watch Saved by the Bell
96. I waited in line at midnight for a Harry Potter book
97. I have seen all of the Lord of the Rings movies & read the books
98. I have never seen Ferris Beuller’s Day Off
99. I believe that Michael Jackson is guilty
100. I can do the moonwalk
101. I can curl my tongue
102. I fluently speak another language
103. I’ve been to another country
104. I’m a really good bowler
105. I know what Brucas or Naley means
106. I have gotten a reputation for being a slut or player
107. I consider myself to be boy or girl crazy
108. When I have pictures taken of myself, I usually like how they turn out
109. I consider myself to be very attractive
110. I hate the color pink
111. I still try to catch fireflies

112. If there was an award for most days absent from school, I would have got it
113. I always got the best attendance awards back in the day
114. I was home schooled
115. I’ve never broken a bone
116. I have no idea who Doug Pickett is
117. Rocky is my favorite movie
118. Superman is the best
119. Sometimes I don’t take a shower everyday
120. i HaTe WhEn PeOpLe TyPe LiKe ThIs
121. hEy I tYpE LiKe ThAt
122. I am lactose and tolerant
123. I have had my tonsils taken out
124. I worry way too much

125. I hate New York
126. I have a six-pack
127. I have my own place
128. I never had Stuffed Crust Pizza
129. Black & White pictures are better than color ones
130. I once stepped on the gas when I meant to step on the brake
131. I make up words when I get angry
132. I’m an only child
133. I hate reading
134. Burger King is better than McDonalds
135. I know how to snowboard
136. I sing Christmas songs in the middle of summer
137. I don’t drink soda
138. I don’t know how to cook or do my own laundry
139. Hot Topic is my favorite store
140. I have brown eyes

141. When I first saw Titanic, I laughed when Leo died
142. The Gap is my favorite store
143. Summer is my favorite season
144. I’m not allergic to anything
145. I had or have glasses or contacts
146. I’ve been to a strip club
147. I have green eyes
148. I once when on a diet that lasted about an hour
149. Nirvana is my favorite band
150. I would eat a bunch of spiders for a million dollars

8/4/06 08:54 am - :)


I have my....


pierced. :)

8/1/06 09:15 am - schedule

Period 1- Studyhall all year 

Period 2- Gym, then Health

Period 3-ChemCom,Mrs. Welch

Period 4- Art II, Spring, Studyhall Fall

Period 5- Lunch .::.ugh.::.

Period 6- World Cultures, Mr Bronson

Period 7- English 11 College, Mrs. Silverstrim

Period 8- Acad. Psychology, Mr Bronson

Period 9- Informal Geometry, Mr. Keister

7/31/06 09:59 pm - Lettmeinyourarmstofeel


Guess who is allowed to get her piercing tomorrow?

Thats right.

When I go with Laura tomorrow I have to see if I can make an App. with him for around 5:30 ish 6 ish tomorrow night. :) Yay. I hope hes open that late...

Does anyone know his hours?

7/21/06 05:00 pm - moree


:: P0P ::
01. I love all things cute and fluffy!
02. I’m a very sensitive and emotional person
03. I am very girly
04. I’m very popular and have heaps of friends
05. I love the colour pink
06. It took me a while to actually grow out of being a little girl
07. I get hyper a lot
08. I’m clumsy and ditzy - you might call be a dumb blonde
Total bolded [ 2]

01. I have plenty of
piercings and want more
02. I have dyed my hair an unnatural colour before
03. I can be loud and obnoxious

04. Some might call me a tomboy
05. My clothing involves fish nets, rips, sewn on patches and spray paint
06. Yeah, I guess you could say I’m WILD
07. I swear a lot
08. I drink a lot of alcohol and do drugs
Total bolded [ 4]

:: HIP H0P/RAP ::
01. I probably don’t speak the English language the way it is supposed to be spoken - it’s all about the slang
02. I own a lot of gold jewellery - which include medallions and huge fuckin’ rings!
03. I can use the word ‘nigger’ to my friends without being attacked
04. I’m pretty much ‘in your face’
05. I wear a lot of sports clothing
06. I wear baseball caps sideways or backwards
07. I smoke
08. I go around in a big gang
Total bolded [0 ]

:: EM0 ::
01. I have an ‘over the face’ haircut
02. I wear a HELL of a lot of eyeliner
03. I like guys who wear make up and who kiss other guys

04. I wear my pants lower than they should be
05. I am very EM0tional
06. I have self harmed
07. I love the nightmare before Christmas!
08. I cry a lot
Total bolded [ 7]

01. I rebell/ed in school and was pretty much ignored
02. I rejoice in being different!
03. All of my clothing is dark
04. I am perfect head banger
05. I go to a lot of gigs
06. I have quite a dramatic yet melancholy personality
07. I am in a band or play an instrument
08. I love to hang out in graveyards
Total Bolded [ 0]




7/21/06 04:49 pm - wooo more!

50 Randoms
1.      Do you pronounce the 'l' in salmon?: Nope
2. When was the last time you went to a bookstore?: Abouttt a month ago
3. Have you ever prank called a restaurant?: Nope
4. How did you meet most of your friends?: School
5. Do you find ancient mythology interesting?: Yep
6. What snacks do you usually buy when you go to the movies?: Raisnets
7. Do you prefer British spelling or American?: Eh, both. :)
8. Have you ever gone sailing?: Nope
9. Have you ever gotten heat exhaustion?: Nope
10. Do you still live in your childhood home?: Yep
11. How much is too much to pay for a concert ticket?: I dont think there is too much
12. What was the greatest prank you've ever pulled?: 'hello is the little mermaid there?'
13. Do you pride yourself on being intelligent?: Ha, well I'm not.
14. Is that pride justified?: I dont have it.
15. If you controlled pop culture, what trend would you change (or introduce)?: Not really sure
16. Have you ever taken a survey twice by accident?: Yep
17. What was the last movie you went to see? Click
18. Have you ever gotten stuck on an amusement park ride?: Ugh. Yes.
19. Do you have a weak stomach?: Not Really.
20. Do you get annoyed when you don't receive any comments on your myspace for a while?: Sort of.
21. How often do you floss?: Hardly ever. I know grossss
22. What was the worst trouble you've ever gotten into?: hmm...I dont remember..
23. Would you ever consider becoming a cop?: Sure
24. If stupidity were a fatal disease, who do you think would be the first to die?: Bush.
25. Are you and your friends loud and obnoxious in public areas?: Sometimes
26. How often do you take and fill out surveys from this community?: All The Time
27. Are you a big New York Yankees fan? Nope
28. Do you own a thesaurus?: Yep
29. When was the last time you visited relatives?: Umm...well they came to my party, so about a month?
30. When was the last time you ate meat?: Last Night.
31. What magazines do you read, if any?: AP
32. What's one thing you get uptight about?: Stupidy with mental illness. Or ignorance I guess is the word?
33. What sport are you best at?: Ha. None.
34. Ever eaten one of those Warheads candies?: Oh my god yes
35. Do you prefer Tootsie Pops or Blow Pops?: Blow Pops
36. Do you ever correct grammatical and typographical errors on survey questions?: Nope
37. How did you get your most recent injury?: Twisted my ankle at a minni golf course. :-P
38. What's the most awkward question you've ever been asked?: How big is Jack's dick. From my brother and joe...yeahhhh
39. Do you own anything from IKEA?: what now?
40. What was the stupidest horror movie you've ever seen?: IT. ><
41. What about the stupidest comedy?: Ummm...ENVY was pretty fucked up
42. Have you ever snuck into a movie?: No. :|
43. True or false- There's no place like home: True. Sometimes.
44. The creepiest place you can think of: Jacks upstairs when its dark.
45. Have you ever seen an albino animal?: Yep. An Albino Horssseeeeyyy
46. Do you think they have chatspeak in Chinese?: whats chatspeak?
47. What color is your front door?: Gray
48. Were you afraid of old people as a child?: Yep
49. Have you ever been visited by a Jehovah's Witness?: Sure have.
50. Have you ever tried summoning Bloody Mary?:God. No.
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